Five Signs You are Living Detached From Your Heart

Have you ever felt disconnected from yourself, like you are living someone's life, or in a dream?

I think too many of us feel this way, but we don't have the words to describe it, or the tools to get past it.  

The first step to reconnecting to your true self is to recognize that you are in fact disconnected.  Here are five signs.

1.  You Don't Feel Your Emotions

The heart is the where our emotions form and exist.  Emotions matter because they aid us in understanding and responding to the world within us and outside us.  Life without emotion is like life without color, without joy, without connection.

If you struggle to feel, or understand what you are feeling on a regular basis, you may be detached from your heart.  A way to test this is to watch a heart felt movie or listen to a friend's struggles. 

When they share, do you feel anything?  Do you empathize or feel your heart move?  

If you instead feel numb, indifferent, or nothing at all, it's possible your heart is disconnected.


2.  You Cry Without a Clear Reason

I remember a season in my young adult life, where in seemingly random moments I would spontaneously burst into tears.  Sometimes it just a tear drop of sadness, other times it was deep howling, soul speaking, raw emotion sobs.  I would often feel better after these cries, but they made no sense to me. 

Where did these tears come from?

I realize now that it was probably the buried pain and hurt in my life boiling up like a volcano, without warning or reason.  It was my heart saying, "I matter.  The pain inside matters.  Come understand the pain and be restored."

If you are having confusing moments of crying, you may be detached.


3.  It's Hard to Find Your Passion

Most of my twenties was wandering, in career and interests.  I would get excited about a path, and then months later lose motivation.  Some of this is my personality.  But a good chunk of my jumping jobs and passions was because I wasn't sure of myself. 

I didn't want to choose to the wrong thing, and I didn't know my values or sense of purpose well enough to be confident in walking out a direction.  

The heart is where our calling, our values, and our drive to live these out resides.  When we are detached from our heart, it's hard to know or follow a passion.


4.  You Often Focus on Yourself

I didn't realize how selfish I was until I saw that I was by in large completely ignoring the emotional needs of my wife.  It was a painful wake up call, but one that helped me better connect to my heart.

Selfishness is often cast as a character trait that we choose.  Conversely, I believe that self focus actually occurs as a sign of our detachment, because caring for others happens through the heart, not the head. 

When we disconnect from our heart and live from our head, we too easily get pre-occupied in thoughts about ourself.


5.  If You're Honest, You Aren't Sure Who You Are

I have a few close friends who struggle to know who they are.  They constantly feel lost.  They may appear composed and put together on the outside, but they describe their identity as a house built on sand, where when storms come, they forget who they are. 

When our heart disconnects, we lose touch with our true self.  I spent the first 20+ years of my life not knowing who I was, apart from the expectations and wants of others.  

So if you don't know who you are are, or if you show any of the others signs, you may be living a life not connected to the root of your true self.


Find Your Heart

It takes courage, honesty, and trust in a guide who knows the way to reclaim your identity and live free from the inside out. 

Consider Rise a safe place to connect with your heart.

Austin McRobbie